“My, what a big ice you have.”

Careful, here.  Saying this to your fellow patron at the bar, especially should they be of the opposite sex, may draw any number of responses.  If they simply misunderstand you, you may be lucky enough to get some equally cheesy response.  If you are originally from the South, as I am, and “ice” sounds more like…well…you might get knocked off your stool.  However, if you are fortunate to be properly understood, hopefully you will be on your way to a great conversation about the enjoyment of spirits.  And, if the comment is directed your way, you can drop some knowledge on the less informed.

You have likely seen spirits served with a single, large ice cube (or ice ball, as the case may be, which opens up a whole different possibility for witty dialogue).  Sure, its trendy, and sure, it does look pretty cool, but we are all serious connoisseurs here right?  None of us would trivialize the moment spent enjoying our favorite bourbon, scotch, rum, tequila, etc. with a silly, fancy ice cube.  Of course not!  Accordingly, I offer the following template when your fellow bar patron quips about the size of you ice:

1)    Why yes, it is rather large.  I try not to bring it out in public often.  (You don’t want to be TOO boring or nerdy.  You are at a bar, after all.)

2)    I don’t always drink my bourbon with ice, but when I do, I prefer big ice.  This is pretty high proof, and a little water helps make it more approachable.  (This is admittedly pretty boring, so feel free to say the first part of this like the guy from the Dos Equis commercials, if being witty is your game.)

3)    This iceberg in my glass actually melts more slowly, thus diluting the drink less quickly.  It also keeps it from getting too cold, and, it doesn’t tend to trap any of the good stuff, so I’m not leaving behind $3 of this $25 drink in the ice.  (OK, please don’t really say the last part, as you will sound like a phenomenal d-bag.)

So, there you go.  You can be stylish, witty and knowledgeable, all while bringing a smidgen of added enjoyment to a pour of your favorite high octane spirit.  Molds are available for all manner of shapes and sizes of large ice cubes that you can make at home.  You will get all the same benefit for your drink, but will unfortunately miss out on the witty banter.